As cases of teen violence in the Valley continue to spike, there have been calls from police and neighbors alike for parents to be more involved and more present.
“Presence is important but it is also sort of a privilege,” said licensed professional counselor and owner of Two Arrows Counseling and Consulting Erica Trocino. “Most parents are working full time. Some have multiple jobs. So, being physically present can be difficult. When you are together, focus on being international with that time and maybe putting phones aside.”
Trocino knows teens’ impulsivity and curiosity can lead to bad outcomes if unregulated.
“Teenagers’ brains are on fire during these years and truly the decision-making part of that brain does not develop until 25,” Trocino told ABC15.
She encourages regular and casual check-ins for parents when they can share a moment with their children, whether that’s driving in the car or sharing a meal. Research from the National Institute of Health has found that regularly eating meals as a family leads to positive outcomes and lowers the risk of future violence.
“A lot of times for me, it’s a lot easier to open up to people of authority when it’s in a casual setting,” said teenager Riana Alexander who founded Arizona Students for Mental Health. “You don’t have to sit down your kids and say ‘We have to talk about this’ but, while you’re cooking dinner, mention it.”
Even awkward conversations can be useful when parents are curious and show they care.
“Most teenagers really appreciate that even though we may not show it,” Alexander said. “Including teens in the conversation is so important because you don’t want to have a conversation about us and about our futures without us at the table.”
